The look-out lady.

Yeah, I see you watchin’ me; I pay attention to things like that. Is this entry of mine an outlet to brag about that fact? No. I’ve never been the bragging type; I like to savor things in silence. I’m simply letting you know that I see you too. So why haven’t I done anything about it yet? Well, it’s simple and complicated at the same time. I know it sounds like an excuse to keep you in suspense, but allow me to explain.

There are several things I’ve noticed about myself when it comes to women, but I’ll just keep it simple and tell you one of them. I like to spoil you, indulge in you and utterly enjoy your company. Sometimes I can get carried away with it. There was a time I had different goals and agendas, a time when a lady in my life was a great idea. Things are different now, and I have much bigger issues I need to take care of before I even think about seducing you.

Now don’t get it twisted, I’m pretty sure you would settle for part of me and that’s not to say I think you would stoop so low, or that piece of me is better then you’ll have with any other guy. What I believe concerning you is that you deserve better then that. I want to give you better then that and I’m afraid if I taste just a little of what that could be like I’ll lose sigh of what I’m doing.

Part of me hopes that you’ll be patient and wait for me to reach the goals I’ve set for myself; that you can see the person I want you to see, appreciate, praise and love. The rest of me knows better then that; that part of me knows that nothing lasts as long as you’d like it to, and that asking you to wait on me wouldn’t be fair, or realistic. I know you have goals too; your race shouldn’t stop just because it’s convenient for me, should it?

Until that day I’ll be watching you in the corner of my eye, seeing what it is you do next, just as you will probably be watching me. The moment you take your eyes off of me, I’ll notice. I’ll likely be saddened by it too, but that is the rolling stone we call progression, the act of moving forward. Why would I ever expect you to stand still? If you ever lose sight of me that’s fine; maybe one day you’ll see me on the T.V. screen?

-streetPoet007

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I piss excellence.

Self praise isn’t something I’m too unfamiliar with; I mean, for the most part I praise myself for almost everything I do well and that I’m sorta proud of. It’s not easy doing great things in a day, and it’s not easy being good at what you do when you’re doing it; or is it?

You see, I’ve come to learn that some of the things I’m so proud of aren’t really as great as I would like to think. I realize achievements are worthy of praise, but what kind of achievements should a person be reward for accomplishing; short-term goals, long-term goals, writing a book, what exactly? I have to wonder at times if my narcissism is another obstacle in my path of achieving great things.

I had to go back in the mind when I was younger and remember all of the negative things people said about me and how they would constantly compare someone they considered better then myself or suggesting I should be more like that person. Even as a child I knew better then to let those suggestions bother me all that much, however it was the illusion that made me the most upset. I knew what excellence was, and that person was not a good example of it at all.

Excellence is the highest degree of good, and if you’re doing slightly better then the people you know, that’s good. However, you should always keep in mind that comparing yourself to others who aren’t on your level will always make you look good. To ensure that you are as magnificent a person as you believe yourself to be, then you should surround yourself with people who feel the same way you do. Even better, surround yourself with individuals who have proven their excellence and put it to test against others of the same caliber.

I believe it very true that you can announce yourself as the best, a great person, and an excellent human being only when you are tested. I say brag about how smart you are when you win top of the class at a university know for its intelligent students. I say brag about how gorgeous you are after winning a Miss America contest. I say you talk about how hood you are or tough you are after winning a championship boxing match. I say claim the position as King of your city only after you have proven no other King is worthy of it.

I have excellence to spare, and it has been tested ever since the age of three. I’ve got throwbacks; I’m a renaissance man so to speak, what about you?

-streetPoet007

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Just a Taste.

Yeah, you know what I mean. It’s that sticky situation you get yourself into when you think you’re strong enough to take a little and leave the rest alone. We’ve all been there once or twice, maybe even three times. I’ve been in this situation too many times to count, and I’m not proud of it, but I can’t say I regret it either.

Why do I get tangled into this crazily weaved web time and time again? I’ll tell you why; it’s because I remember all-too-well the times I walked away from a good thing and slapped myself for it later. I guess I figured, “why not slap yourself for consequences now rather then for the not knowing later?” It’s a flawed philosophy, I know, but I can’t really say I missed out on much anymore.

This evil temptation seems to be a two-way door; you can even tempt others, rather then being the tempted. Sly little invitations like “just one time” or “just a little bit” can seem so innocent when you know the deed is wrong already, but somehow the implication of a brief encounter or small morsel of tribute can seduce even the most righteous individual; and in that “little bit” or that “just once” can span an extended encounter of grief and guilt sure to follow.

Oh, but it is the tempter who already understood this from the beginning. They savor the entire “dessert” when requesting only the cherry on top. In principle, they become “the beggar who only wanted a nickel who in the end received a fortune”. The person who let their guard down pretty much knew what was going to happen; they secretly just hoped they could escape the consequences that came afterward. However, there are those strange instances where there is no guilt, and both the tempter and the tempted are both left grinning.

It is these rare occasion that I dwell in, not because they are few, but because they are invigorating. It’s the idea of two individuals doing a very wrong and immoral thing, enjoying it, getting away with it and not feeling guilty about it. My oh my, things can really get messy when a taste-test becomes a binge, and it’s even better when it tastes so good you suck your fingers and lick the plate.

But, when it makes your mouth water… to the point you want to share what you taste with the other person, as if they couldn’t possibly understand any other way, that’s the point of no return. Expect life to throw a lot of sour lemons at you for a very long time. I guess you make lemonade after that, right? Good luck! [Laughing]  -streetPoet007

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